Indigo, Double Bay (15 November 2015)
Wednesday, November 18, 2015Indigo enjoys a strategic monopoly in one of Sydney's most affluent yet culturally devoid locations, Double Bay. If you are hungry and 45% of your salary does not go to the ATO each year, please avoid. Reflected in scarce parking and long queues, the locals love it.
We are quickly profiled by the staff: Soccer mums? No. Latest model BMs? No. Clumsy parking job? No. That's 0/3 in terms of preferred customer status.
Standard latte - $4.00.
Cup one is cold, cup two is scalding. Quality control matches school kids manning an instant coffee stand at a fundraiser.
I read 'fresh from the farm' on the menu then see near 30 choices. Instant disqualification because no farm has that many crops. Eyeballing the adjacent tables, we blindly follow.
Breakfast bruschetta with bacon, eggs, avo and tomato salsa - $23.90
Awkward chopping job and a messy, monotony of familiar flavours. A finish of olive oil is as clever as the price ($24). This is bacon and eggs on toast with a tomato overload.
Yolk porn comfort is sought. 5/10.
Open snapper omelette with snapper pomme purree, spinach and light cream - $21.90
Long-list of unheard of ingredients, similar to packet Campbell Soup. However, snapper arouses my interest.
No sign of my meal after 60 min and once delivered, something is fishy...
Chef must be a terrible fisherman. The slippery beast was never caught! No visual nor flavour cues to suggest this anything more than an egg-only dish.
$22 for a well-sized, fluffy omelette with a soft cheese overlay that lacks salt. Satiety and pretty scatter of leaves enables some ratings recovery. 7/10.
A departing comment on service. Bruschetta takes 15 min to arrive, no sign of omelette after 50 min. Waiter forcibly explains I did not order 'clearly enough'. Must be my working class accent.
Avoid, avoid, avoid:
- Food - 6/10 - menu-oversell disguising fairly standard offers. Decent execution.
- Value - 6/10 - suburb name has 'double'. Apply this to 'normal' pricing.
- Other - 3/10 - deep queues post 9:30am, cramped space, rude staff.
- Overall - 5/10 - inexplicable popularity with the locals.
In Chinatown, rude service is a leading indicator of authentic food. In Double Bay, it's a lagging indicator of a low-quality cafe.
Will I be returning?
No
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